So here it goes. The blog that will set off the beginning of the rest of my life; the blog that will place meaning upon my millennial ideals; the meaning that I’ve searched and yearned for these past 27 years. This very blog will allow me to say every fleetingly creative, profound and introspective thing that has ever crossed my mind….

As you can tell, I’ve placed zero pressure upon the success of this online journal. A type of journal that was created by the people of my generation. A journal that in turn got a new name:
{See Blog: a regularly updated website or web page, typically one run by an individual or small group, that is written in an informal or conversational style. Note: Thank Google}
A journal that only emphasizes the stamp of narcissism that the millennial generation carries and acknowledges like the red headed step child it is.

Because we are millennials; we want to share our lives, experiences and every god forsaken moment with you. Like, every moment. Even down to posting ultra sound photos of our fetuses on Facebook, Instagram and Twitter because we are all rad technicians and can totally tell that that small grayish blackish blurb is a penis. Because everything we do is more significant than anything anyone else before us has done and it’s so dang special it MUST be seen by everyone you know, along with anyone who isn’t your friend but a friend of a friend who you tagged.

Did I mention that I’m great at sarcastic opinionated rants? No?! Okay, well now that I’ve gotten that off of my chest and can myself admit to posting pointless crap all over my Bookface {See the thousands of pictures of my dog} I can apologize for:

A. Making fun of your ultra sound photos. To you, they’re beautiful and wonderful and you SHOULD be proud.

And
B. Move on to the title of this pioneering blog:
Millennial-Schmellennial

Between 1980 and 2000, Millennials were created. Created by Boomers and some Gen X parents who were typically in their early to mid 20’s when they chose to create genetic masses resembling themselves. This glorious age until very recently {See millennial, see 30 is the new 20} was when we were to be fully enthralled by our careers and on the path to success and wealth. We are after all, the most educated generation of our time. I use the term”Educated” loosely because this technically translates into someone who has a college degree which used to be significant on a resume. Until everyone got a college degree. Now you’re just one of the millions of educated individuals running around in a pool of intellect. And the craziest thing is if you don’t have a college degree, you’re scoffed at even though this nearly insignificant piece of cardstock doesn’t really matter all that much anymore.

But I digress. We millennials are all supposed to be doing something that we can do for the rest of our lives. But we aren’t. Instead we’re searching for something great to do for the rest of our lives while being conscious of the fact that were only getting older day by day and that degree you got 3 years ago is losing its value…. Quickly.
I can’t speak for all of us; I know a lot of millennials who are succeeding in their careers. I know a lot of millennials who are still working on their ultimate goal through graduate programs and med school. But I do speak on behalf of myself and for the others who are floundering. We aren’t losers or dead beats, we all work hard for the money {so hard for it, honey}. Some of us work hard to pay the rent or to get ahead of college debt while living with parents. We work hard for the money, but it really isn’t treating us right.

Some of us are struggling with an economy that only recently came out of a recession. In 2008, our economic strong hold came cascading down on both small and large businesses alike. At this time, I was only a sophomore in college and my perception of money and success came in the form of two jobs as a barista/sales associate at Macy’s and the grades I received in class. I will say, unlike some millennials today, my reliance on my parents was minimal. I had moral support to no end, but financially, I learned to do a lot of things on my own early. But I always had this overarching idea based on what others told me I could (and SHOULD) do: that I would graduate from college and find a fabulous counseling job where I could gain experience and help people like I had always dreamed of doing while studying for my GRE’s where I would then get into grad school, obtain a masters or even a PhD, licensure, etc. and live happily ever after….. P.S. I love run on sentences.

And then reality ensues. I graduated in 2011. I researched cover letters, resumes for psych grads, I applied to every counseling office in my college town (Mind you I was trying to remain in my college town in order to easily go back to grad school) and I was met with nothing. I didn’t try for very long and I have to say, I gave up. I was so insanely broke. I remember living off of terrible food from the 7-Eleven next to my apartment complex and scrounging up enough change to buy a Mike’s hard lemonade on Friday nights… or nights when a hard beverage was simply needed. I was eventually offered what seemed to be the first of many “great opportunities” working for a subcontractor in my hometown. So, I moved back to my home city and continued to work two jobs. I was slowly getting ahead yet hated my job as a glorified office assistant, working for a chauvinistic pervert while still slinging coffee at my good old barista job on the weekends. I skipped around for the next two years all while doubting my worth as person and feeling this inescapable disappointment in who I had become: a person who hated what they stood for: Nothing.

But who I do I blame other than myself? I guess I’m upset with perception. I’m pretty pissed off at the goals other people had for me. I’m angry at myself for warping the goals of others into an ideal future for myself without listening to the one person I should have listened to in the first place. Myself.

There is something to be said of who raised us Millennials. My parents were both technically baby boomer babies who were told their entire lives that success was money: consumerism, private business and major corporations were on the rise during their adolescence. See this point explained from the incredibly credible Wikipedia:​

“Steve Gillon has suggested that one thing that sets the baby boomers apart from other generational groups is the fact that “almost from the time they were conceived, Boomers were dissected, analyzed, and pitched to by modern marketers, who reinforced a sense of generational distinctiveness”.[19] This is supported by the articles of the late 1940s identifying the increasing number of babies as an economic boom, such as a 1948 Newsweek article whose title proclaimed “Babies Mean Business”,[20]” http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Baby_boomers

To top it off, both of them came from poor families which only fed their desire to one day not stress about finances.
Both of my parents perceived success as something very tangible, very materialistic. It was something you could touch and see; something you could put onto paper and say: “EVERYBODY, COME LOOK AT HOW GREAT I AM!” {Much like how Millennials use their social media} My mother listened to her family in regards to her own success. She, like me, wanted to help others. She wanted to be a social worker. She instead listened to a family member that told her “there was no money in social work” and went to work in real estate for 22 years. By 40, my mother had already gone bankrupt, developed diverticulosis and was harboring an addiction to multiple forms of speed, specifically meth. But that’s another tail.
My father didn’t set off a stable career until his mid-40s.

Growing up, my mother did a wonderful job of always telling me that I could be anything I wanted to be some day and I whole heartedly believed her. Individualism rose over the 80’s and 90’s, and I’m sure I was not alone in hearing this same encouragement. My greatest example of this was being absolutely terrible at soccer as a child yet still receiving a trophy at the end of the season. I remember holding that trophy, rolling it around in each hand and thinking “What did I do to deserve this trophy?” I was very aware that I was bad at soccer; I freaking hated playing the damn sport. But I was a fat kid and I pretended to be interested because I came from a “soccer family”. It didn’t end at the trophy though. You fellow millennials my age will agree; we got certificates and trophies for doing nothing at all.

The Gist:

1.  I am not applying myself to a general generational set of characteristics.  I am a wanderer and ponderer but for many of my own reasons, not just because it is typical of my generation.  However, there is something to be said of the time period I was born into.

2.  I am striving for more than what is typical while simultaneously standing in my own way.

3.  I want in on the push for change.  Change on what we value as a people, change on how we treat one another and change on how we treat our world.

The only way I know how to convey this Gist is through my writing.  I’ve been writing since I was 10 years old yet have never been brave enough to put it out there.  I was never smart enough to realize that a college education is one thing; being creative with an education is another.  It’s so easy to flow into each of life’s checkpoints (college, career, marriage, baby….. death) and I’d rather take the rougher, more mysterious road without checkpoints.  Life is what we make of it and I’m ready to be brave enough to take control of my own.  I appreciate anyone who took the time to read this ungodly long post.

So much love,

Peace My friends.

** Credit goes to Google Search, Wikipedia and Shel Silverstein